ogden nash quotes

The Rabbits The Cow
Here is a verse about rabbits The cow is of the bovine ilk;
That doesn't mention their habits. One end is moo, the other, milk.
-- Ogden Nash

Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy,
But it's very funny -- did you ever try buying them without money?
-- Ogden Nash

Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny--
Did you ever try buying them without money?

-- Ogden Nash

A mighty creature is the germ,
Though smaller than the pachyderm.
His customary dwelling place
Is deep within the human race.
His childish pride he often pleases
By giving people strange diseases.
Do you, my poppet, feel infirm?
You probably contain a germ.
-- Ogden Nash

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

-- Ogden Nash

One thing about the past.
It's likely to last.
-- Ogden Nash

The rhino is a homely beast,
For human eyes he's not a feast.
Farewell, farewell, you old rhinoceros,
I'll stare at something less prepoceros.
-- Ogden Nash

Children aren't happy without something to ignore,
And that's what parents were created for.
-- Ogden Nash

I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if he
has income and she is pattable.
-- Ogden Nash

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

-- Ogden Nash

Children aren't happy without something to ignore,
And that's what parents were created for.

-- Ogden Nash

I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree.
Perhaps, unless the billboards fall
I'll never see a tree at all.

-- Ogden Nash

The camel has a single hump;
The dromedary two;
Or else the other way around.
I'm never sure. Are you?

-- Ogden Nash

The Pig, if I am not mistaken,
Gives us ham and pork and Bacon.
Let others think his heart is big,
I think it stupid of the Pig.

-- Ogden Nash

I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if he
has income and she is pattable.
-- Ogden Nash

The turtle lives 'twixt plated decks
Which practically conceal its sex.
I think it clever of the turtle
In such a fix to be so fertile.

-- Ogden Nash

Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but
it's very funny -- Did you ever try buying then without
money?

-- Ogden Nash

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
-- Ogden Nash

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they
want that they really don't want it.

-- Ogden Nash, American humorist and poet (1902-1971)

The turtle lives 'twixt plated decks
Which practically conceal its sex.
I think it clever of the turtle
In such a fix to be so fertile.

-- Ogden Nash