I wrote an ad for Apple Computer: "Macintosh - We might not get
everything right, but at least we knew the century was going to
end."
-- Douglas Adams
I wrote an ad for Apple Computer: "Macintosh - We might not get
everything right, but at least we knew the century was going to
end."
-- Douglas Adams
Never ask what sort of computer a guy drives. If he's a Mac
user, he'll tell you. If not, why embarrass him?
-- Tom Clancy
Macintosh Programmer's Workshop Error Message:
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-- Internet Config Balloon Help
The dogcow has a name, and it's not Myria. The dogcow's name is
Clarus. Several people have said to me, "Mark, you handsome devil,
I think I've heard that name, or something similar, somewhere
before." I always tell them, "No, you're hallucinating again. You
never remember anything." The dogcow's name is Clarus for the same
reason you call a table a "table."
-- Technote #31: The Dogcow
My friends, each of you is a single cell in the great body of the
state. And today, that great body has purged itself of parasites.
We have triumphed over the unprincipled dissemination of facts.
The thugs and wreckers have been cast out and the poisonous
weeds of disinformation have been cosigned to the dustbin of
history. Let each and every cell rejoice! For today we
celebrate the first, glorious anniversary of the Information
Purification Directive.
We have created, for the first time in all history, a garden of
pure ideology, where each worker may bloom secure from the pests
of contradictory and confusing truths. Our unification of thought
is a more powerful weapon than any fleet or army on earth! We are
one people. With one will. One resolve. One cause. Our enemies
shall talk themselves to death, and we will bury them with their
own confusion. We shall prevail!
-- Big Brother, Apple's "1984" commercial
Do you always buy the market-dominant product simply because
of that market dominance?
-- Guy Kawasaki
Well, to create a new standard it takes something that's not just
a little bit different, it takes something that's really new, and
really captures people's imagination. And, the Macintosh, of all
the machines I've ever seen, is the only one that meets that standard.
-- Bill Gates
I bought my first computer in 1989. At the time everybody I knew
used Macintosh. And it still seems like that's kind of the
case - like Macintosh is the computer of all the creative
disciplines.
-- Moby
Q: How many Macintosh users does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Did you try rebooting with extensions off?
The end-user cost for this machine should be $500 or less, to be
sold early in 1982 (or, better still, by Christmas 1981).
-- Jef Raskin, May 1979
Describing the prototype to later become the
Macintosh
It's better to be a pirate than to join the Navy.
-- Steve Jobs
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in
higher regard those who think alike than those who think differently.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche
Microsoft recently released its new Windows 2000. What are some
of the features of the new operating system?
* Crashes up to 300 percent faster than Windows '98
* Comes with free webcam, which must be kept on at all times
* Fully Y2K compliant
* Special "cost" feature increases Bill Gates' wealth
* Lets you play exiting games like Minesweeper, Solitaire, and
Mindlessly-Add-Up-The-Numbers-40-Hours-A-Week
* New bathroom break scheduler
* Instructs computer to thunder, "I love you, organic master!"
at random intervals
* Conveniently forwards all e-mail to Redmond, WA
-- The Onion
It's not like Windows users don't have any power. I think they are
happy with Windows, and that's an incredibly depressing thought.
-- Steve Jobs
Read MacUser, Macworld (even though the inside back column just
isn't what it used to be), MacWEEK, and MacToday on airplanes and
then leave them in the seat pockets for the next passenger.
-- Guy Kawasaki
Q: How many Apple Newton users does it take to screw
in a lightbulb?
A: Only one, tharks to the extnq-producilve handwritling processcr.
Macintosh Programmer's Workshop Error Message:
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10-11 (I know you don't care, I'm just trying to annoy you)
You can have a good product with a lot of good
philosophical thinking behind it - a lot of pureness - and still
not sell. You gotta have some luck, too. The NeXT is a
good machine that just didn't have the luck to make it successful.
-- Steve Wozniak
Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window.
-- Steve Wozniak
When you see people using a PC (a dead giveaway of PC laptop is
that Solitaire is running), ask them if their company forced them
to use it.
-- Guy Kawasaki
The minimum number of holes in the case through which fingers,
screwdrivers (either metallic or liquid), EMI or earwigs can crawl
is to be desired.
-- Jef Raskin, May 1979
Describing the prototype to later become the
Macintosh
We won. Every computer in the world is basically a Macintosh now.
-- Steve Wozniak
Macintosh Programmer's Workshop Error Message:
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Macintosh PowerBook 5300/ce117: Notebook Computer & Desktop
Hibachi
One of the deep mysteries to me is our logo, the symbol of lust
and knowledge, bitten into, all crossed with the colors of the
rainbow in the wrong order. You couldn't dream of a more appropriate
logo: lust, knowledge, hope, and anarchy.
-- Jean-Louis Gassee
Pretty much, Apple and Dell are the only ones in this industry
making money. They make it by being Wal-Mart. We make it by innovation.
-- Steve Jobs
More than two months after I first installed the Professional
version on my Compaq Armada M300, The Laptop That Wouldn't Run
Windows 2000 finally does. All it needed was three teleconferences
with Microsoft and Compaq engineers, marketers and PR people; FedEx
trips first to one company's labs, then to the other's and ultimately
a new motherboard.
-- Henry Norr
26 March 2001, SF Gate
Imagine the disincentive to software development if after months of
work another company could come along and copy your work and market
it under its own name...without legal restraints to such copying,
companies like Apple could not afford to advance the state of the art.
-- Bill Gates
Mac people are just cooler. Mac users have a soul. People don't
tell you "I love my Dell" or "I love Windows." But you hear people
say "I love my Mac" all the time.
-- Bob LeVitus