Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when
you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when
you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where,
it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.
-- Fran Lebowitz
It is imperative when flying coach that you restrain any tendency toward
the vividly imaginative. For although it may momentarily appear to be the
case, it is not at all likely that the cabin is entirely inhabited by
crying babies smoking inexpensive domestic cigars.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
It is imperative when flying coach that you restrain any tendency toward
the vividly imaginative. For although it may momentarily appear to be the
case, it is not at all likely that the cabin is entirely inhabited by
crying babies smoking inexpensive domestic cigars.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he is buying.
-- Fran Lebowitz
No animal should ever jump on the dining room furniture unless
absolutely certain he can hold his own in conversation.
-- Fran Lebowitz
“All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact,
barely presentable.”
-- Fran Lebowitz
If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient
evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"
The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
The three questions of greatest concern are -- 1. Is it attractive?
2. Is it amusing? 3. Does it know its place?
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"
The three questions of greatest concern are -- 1. Is it attractive?
2. Is it amusing? 3. Does it know its place?
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"
Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when
you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
Smoking is, as far as I'm concerned, the entire point of being an adult.
-- Fran Lebowitz
Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born
to people you could not have possibly met.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
Educational television should be absolutely forbidden. It can only lead
to unreasonable disappointment when your child discovers that the letters
of the alphabet do not leap up out of books and dance around with
royal-blue chickens.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
“Don't bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add.” (Fran Lebowitz)
No animal should ever jump on the dining room furniture unless
absolutely certain he can hold his own in conversation.
-- Fran Lebowitz
Your responsibility as a parent is not as great as you might imagine. You
need not supply the world with the next conqueror of disease or major motion
picture star. If your child simply grows up to be someone who does not use
the word "collectible" as a noun, you can consider yourself an unqualified
success.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
People (a group that in my opinion has always attracted an undue amount of
attention) have often been likened to snowflakes. This analogy is meant to
suggest that each is unique -- no two alike. This is quite patently not the
case. People ... are simply a dime a dozen. And, I hasten to add, their
only similarity to snowflakes resides in their invariable and lamentable
tendency to turn, after a few warm days, to slush.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having
to offer them a drink.
-- Fran Lebowitz
There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death.
Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behaviour.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"
If you're going to America, bring your own food.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
Your responsibility as a parent is not as great as you might imagine. You
need not supply the world with the next conqueror of disease or major motion
picture star. If your child simply grows up to be someone who does not use
the word "collectible" as a noun, you can consider yourself an unqualified
success.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact,
barely presentable.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"
Educational television should be absolutely forbidden. It can only lead
to unreasonable disappointment when your child discovers that the letters
of the alphabet do not leap up out of books and dance around with
royal-blue chickens.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer
them a drink.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Interview"
There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death.
Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behaviour.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"
All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact,
barely presentable.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"
If you're going to America, bring your own food.
-- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"
Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where,
it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.
-- Fran Lebowitz