A collection of quotes, fortunes, anecdotes, and quips. Get new quotes everyday on facebook, twitter, and tumblr.

Around the house, I never lift a finger
As a husband and father I'm sub-par
I'd rather drink a beer
than win Father of the Year
I'm happy with things the way they are

-- Homer Simpson
Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(annoyed grunt)ocious


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